yes its christmas. time for a major update. i have cancer. anyone that knows me and reads this, congrats. i haven't told anyone else. i don't know what else to add. i've been used again so others get what they want. but what else is new? i've done more thinking lately. about death and can't help but asking myself what will i see when i die. i've been trying to make peace with anyone i've wronged in my life. the list is long, and i'm not that big on time anymore. but thats not new. its all for the best that i die. i haven't done any good for anyone in a long time. and i'm not noticed that much either. i've kind of disappeared from the world already. i take it as an omen that my time is coming to a close. i was walking with two friends once and we were talking about death and living. oone friend turns to us and says, "death will be a great adventure to have." my other friend says, "to live, that would be the greatest adventure of them all."